2015

The last day of December, the last day of the year.

Usually this is a time when I realise how unmindful and unreflective I had been in the last 300 days or so, and there is no exception to this year.

I can't very well remember how and when the year I started, and if I do recall particular events, I can't say for sure whether they happened in 2014 or 2015. There is no doubt that I could've easily investigated my calendar or email records to find out what events (/achievements) actually took place in 2015, but somehow it feels appropriate to attempt an "impressionist" review of my 2015 - pulling out themes for the year through recalling emotions and experiences that left the deepest marks on my memory and my subconscious. (I'm aware this may sound unnecessarily mystical, but honestly I don't know of any better way of expressing this)

Yes.

2015 was amoral; or more intelligibly - my outlook in 2015 was not to judge actions and decisions (myself and others) based on reasoning with respect to duties or principles, but whether I felt they were appropriate or inappropriate in the given circumstances.

The question of whether an action was ethical wasn't as important as whether that action was 'fitting' at the time, place, and state-of-affairs. What had been done and said felt like they had been done and said as a matter of necessity and fit, and less so a matter of rational decision. I suspect another way of putting this is to say that I had been impulsive, but then I am not so sure if the word fully captures my increased empathy to others who see things in the same light.

I think 2015 has saw me transform into someone much more receptive to Nietzschean ideas, even more so than before.

2015 was also a lot about being more prudent with emotions. More wary I am this year than ever that unbridled emotions are powerful and can be devastating. Once you fall, it takes time and effort to pull yourself back together. Hence - hence, perhaps the psychological "bridles" self-imposed in my experiencing any art forms (I say "experiencing" - read "painting" / "playing / listening to music") were both justified and for the best.

First World Problem I

Recently, I've found myself thinking:

I've always loved ideas and concepts, ideal things... things which are beyond the every day physical experience, things which are 'out there' but at the same anyone with a mind can access. I love spending time thinking, reading, contemplating, and writing about these ideas, puzzles, theories. And yet, the everyday work-life seems to be pulling me in the other direction, drawing me towards the mundane, towards the routine, the boring: bills, household chores, groceries, calendars, commuting, to-read lists, to-do lists, etc. It's bloody endless. 

Every now and then, I'd try to focus and to read, to think - properly, like I'd used to. But one must admit, it does take a good amount of willpower and discipline to 'find the time', or to somehow incorporate these simple activities into one's working life. You're only five minutes into a book, and then you realise there's something meaningless and boring you have to do... this calls for this, surely: 

 

Frustrating it is, yet I am sure there is another way of living life where you can live an intellectual, mindful life whilst balanced against the great pull from the mundane tides of life. I am almost certain that many had, and have faced the same struggle as they go on to write all these great books and accomplish all these great things. How did/do people cope? Is it money? Sheer willpower? Or some magic time-management golden rule?

...

But isn't it almost immoral, to complain about a 'first-world problem' when others are facing life-critical 'mundane' problems, like poverty or disease? What possible rejoinder can I possibly come up with, to this?

An exercise on self-identity

If I were ask you to write down an exhaustive list of beliefs (and principles, if any) that you have relied on for making all the important decisions in your life...

...what would that list look like?

The very activity of composing this list will reveal inconsistencies of beliefs as well as acts of hypocrisy, I'm sure, for I doubt few can train themselves to be so mindful of their own thoughts and behaviour such that they can lead a perfectly consistent one. You might find yourself for instance to be avidly opposed to others consuming dog-meat, yet at the same time find it agreeable to your conscience for them to consume other forms of meat. It's inconsistent, but it's an easy one to miss.  

...Anyway, it shouldn't matter if you realise you have held or hold contradictory beliefs. In my opinion, it's probably a sort of trait typical of the human race that we're unlikely to ever get rid of, regardless of the x amount of money spent on education.

But back to the list - wouldn't this list be a good picture, a good representation of who you are?

What would be the first few items on my list?

1. Always keep an open mind to ideas and be wary of ideology... 
2. Let reason guide your important decisions, but do not neglect the importance of what your emotions tell you...
3. It is better to be sad, conscious and wise than to be ignorant, happy and living a 'programmed' life...

I very quickly realise that these beliefs and principles are - to some extent - what I aspire to adhere to, than ones which I actually use to guide my decisions in life.

And then I think, had this list been completed, how accurate would it be as a representation of me?

Maybe that's another way of asking, how well do I know myself?

Note to self: when I do find the time at some point, I'll definitely finish off that list and post it on here. 

Repost: On Melancholy

"Melancholy is a species of sadness that arises when we are open to the fact that life is inherently difficult and that suffering and disappointment are core parts of universal experience. It’s not a disorder that needs to be cured. Modern society tends to emphasise buoyancy and cheerfulness. But we have to admit that reality is for the most part about grief and loss. The good life is not one immune to sadness, but one in which suffering contributes to our development."

http://www.thebookoflife.org/in-praise-of-melancholy/


A really enlightening read.

This site almost makes me feel that if I had to write anything as a form of  'philosophical consolation', I would be adding zero value to the Internet.

Is our society in moral decline?

We're in moral decline: this is an idea that I've frequently come across in what other people have said, but never gave any serious attention to. 

This is the idea that our society is displaying a trend, where it is becoming more and more open to values and ideas that we've in the past deemed immoral and inappropriate: 

• Being open about one's homosexuality,
• Legalisation of marijuana,
• Increased acceptance to inter-racial relationships and relationships with huge age disparities,
• The public discussion of sex and related topics considered less of a taboo,
• Break down of social hierarchy between rich and poor, old and young

... and perhaps many more others. (None of these phenomena are absolutely global, but are definitely evident in some societies) 

As far as I'm concerned, these 'trends' do not exactly overwhelm me either positively or negatively. I have a feeling that I have, more than many others who are concerned about this moral decline, a better understanding of what morality really is (in a sort of meta-ethics context). (See here and here)

Morality is akin to emotions and bodily feelings: my opinion is that as best practice, we shouldn't let our feelings of morality affect our judgement any more than we shouldn't let our feelings of hunger or lust affect our actions. 

Moral decline or not - for me, that doesn't seem to be a huge issue to fuss over. What's probably worth spending more time on is to analysing the material and (socio-)psychological consequences of these 'moral' trends, and acting to make the best of what could and probably will happen.  

A lull - a rut

It has been a fairly long time since I've written anything in this blog, and it has gotten to the point that I've almost convinced myself that I have abandoned this blog for good. But subconsciously I somehow knew that I would come back once in a while, and publish something - even if that 'something' no longer has any comparable amount of 'philosophical content' as the previous posts in this blog. 

Working a full time job has really brought me to shift my attention on things that - at least on the outset - have no relation to philosophy: finances, keeping up with industry developments, reading the news, household chores, (trying to) exercise, etc. I'm still spending a good amount of time reading and thinking: but whilst before the object of the reading and thinking are primarily ideas, they are more-so now, things. Not necessarily things in the sense of material objects, but things which are practical and 'mundane'. Things which play a bigger role in allowing me to stay alive as a human being, essentially.  

It wasn't so much that these things did not take up any of my attention before - it was more that these things have always been on the side-lines, at the back of mind. It probably shouldn't have been.  

This is the phase that I'm currently on - where these things have found their way to the front of my mind, and have received way more attention than I would have permitted myself before; before - when I was still formally a philosophy student, and more concerned with 'problems' such as how concepts are relate with each other. 

The Blog Writer's Existential Problem

What is the purpose of writing, if no one else is to read what is written?

Perhaps writing is therapeutic. But why write it in a blog?

Perhaps the writer hopes that someone else would read it. But why the half-measure? Why not market the blog?

Perhaps marketing the blog is self-defeating - it takes away the therapeutic effect of writing. Marketing blogs is an activity that is stressful... and mundane.

Then why write it in a blog?

Suspending Philosophical Thought

Is it possible to live an unexamined life that is worth living? 

And once you have 'examined' it, does that mean you do not have to examine it ever again?

Of course this does sound like the beginning of the sort of cliché nit-picking exercise that philosophers do. Philosophy - an activity that just seems completely unproductive, aimless; and in other words, a waste of time. 

In these last several months, I have not done anything of 'philosophical relevance'. This simply means that I haven't been reading anything written by philosophers, and neither have I been writing anything on stuff like logic, existence, morality, whatsoever. 

My mind wasn't idle though: my day-time job still involves a reasonably taxing amount of mental work, and I am learning new things - new ways of doing things - new things that are in the world - every day. So it couldn't be said that I've stopped thinking - I have only stopped thinking philosophically. If that makes sense. 

I most certainly am not relieved that I am no longer doing philosophy. It is not a positive feeling. I enjoyed philosophy. So I am definitely sure that I miss it, but aside from feelings I do not have any good rational justification for spending a significant amount of my time on philosophy. Unless, of course, if all the reasons of our actions are ultimately reducible to feelings...

Philosophy may be useful as a dinner-table topic, but it's not even something that everyone enjoys. Philosophy doesn't pay for the material goods that my body needs for its day-to-day functioning, and ipso facto it doesn't - materially or financially - support itself as an activity that is worth doing.   

Isn't it an indication of something profound that so much time have been spent (wasted) on figuring out whether philosophy is worth doing?   

Year in Review 2014

Admittedly, this "Year in Review" is a whole month too late. Men are often distracted from what they ought to be doing by changes in circumstance -- not to really blame this on human nature, but in this case I do feel that I have spent less time on this blog than I ought to have. Ever since I began working, I've been less able to afford time to think about fundamental questions (about "being"/existence, and the nature of various concepts) and to acquire knowledge about the world. Generally, there is also less time to read and to fish about the internet to find articles and writing that stimulates me. 

In my mind, the value of these activities have never diminished, and it is purely a matter of hard circumstances which has altered my habits. As odd as it is to say this, observing this disheartens me, and triggers a sort of frustration within me to do better -- a wake-up call -- to find a new balance between financial freedom and other things I value in life. 

This may be one of the most common existential problems inflicting people in the modern world. 

What I haven't done enough in 2014, I want to do more in 2015. I want to go places, meet people, learn about languages and cultures, read books, think new thoughts, and write (a lot). I want to have stimulating, deep conversations with people. I want to spend time on my guitar, and explore what I can do with it. I want to spend more time being creative, and less time repeating meaningless routines. While I should probably also think about financial growth and career progression, these two things somewhat come lower in rank in my list of frustrations. To use a teenage rebellious phrase not used in a long time -- whatever. 

To travel. 

Here's a list of posts like the one I did last year, except this year there are fewer posts -- and in vain I hope the quality compensates for the decrease in quantity.  

1. A Picture of A Modern Man (January)

2. Doing Philosophy is Like Wiping Glasses (February)

3. How Real is Traditional Chinese Medicine? (February)

4. 點解要用粵文? (March)
5. On philosophy of [an empirical science] (March)
6. Storm(s) (August)
7. Practicalities and the Moment (August)