2015

The last day of December, the last day of the year.

Usually this is a time when I realise how unmindful and unreflective I had been in the last 300 days or so, and there is no exception to this year.

I can't very well remember how and when the year I started, and if I do recall particular events, I can't say for sure whether they happened in 2014 or 2015. There is no doubt that I could've easily investigated my calendar or email records to find out what events (/achievements) actually took place in 2015, but somehow it feels appropriate to attempt an "impressionist" review of my 2015 - pulling out themes for the year through recalling emotions and experiences that left the deepest marks on my memory and my subconscious. (I'm aware this may sound unnecessarily mystical, but honestly I don't know of any better way of expressing this)

Yes.

2015 was amoral; or more intelligibly - my outlook in 2015 was not to judge actions and decisions (myself and others) based on reasoning with respect to duties or principles, but whether I felt they were appropriate or inappropriate in the given circumstances.

The question of whether an action was ethical wasn't as important as whether that action was 'fitting' at the time, place, and state-of-affairs. What had been done and said felt like they had been done and said as a matter of necessity and fit, and less so a matter of rational decision. I suspect another way of putting this is to say that I had been impulsive, but then I am not so sure if the word fully captures my increased empathy to others who see things in the same light.

I think 2015 has saw me transform into someone much more receptive to Nietzschean ideas, even more so than before.

2015 was also a lot about being more prudent with emotions. More wary I am this year than ever that unbridled emotions are powerful and can be devastating. Once you fall, it takes time and effort to pull yourself back together. Hence - hence, perhaps the psychological "bridles" self-imposed in my experiencing any art forms (I say "experiencing" - read "painting" / "playing / listening to music") were both justified and for the best.