Be a chicken - it's okay

Every now and then, we experience scenarios where our peers pressure us into doing things that we feel uncomfortable or unsure about: be it pulling off a huge prank, jumping down a whole flight of stairs or consume a whole pint of beer in ten seconds. Less juvenile examples include being pressured into singing or giving a speech in public.

At some point, someone is bound to say, "c'mon, don't be a chicken!" or "man up!". 

The response is usually that of embarrassment mixed with frustration, and not unusally a pinch of anger, where we end up either succumbing to peer pressure or having to suffer from the mockery of friends (sometimes enemies).

While it is glaringly obvious when it is mentioned, but we do sometimes forget that our ability to feel fear or discomfort is a protective mechanism that we as homo sapiens have developed through evolution. Fear plays an important function in preventing us from injuring or even killing ourselves, and this applies both physically or socially: fear of singing or dancing in public can certainly be justified sometimes by the likelihood of that very act in destroying every ounce of respect that the audience has for that person. 

This by no means suggest that fear is rational - we can still have pretty irrational fear of things, such as spiders, heights, and small spaces. What I'm suggesting is that we should bear in mind that fear is sometimes useful, and that we really need to take that into consideration as we decide whether an action should be taken. 

Try the Aristotelian idea of a golden mean of virtues as a tool for consideration: both having excessive bravery (headstrong) and its opposite (cowardice) are undesirable vices, but the 'optimal', virtuous amount of bravery is courage, which stands as a mean between the two excessive vices. The golden mean can vary enormously in different circumstances, and hence if you buy Aristotle's idea then it's not always desirable not to be a chicken. For those who are interested in a similar idea discussed in Chinese philosophy, the Confucian "Middle Way" (中庸之道) does pretty much the same job - if you're looking for some consolation from Chinese philosophy. 

So relax if you manage to get yourself into one of these familiar scenarios again - it is sometimes okay to be a chicken.

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